I am vulnerably sharing a massive realization I recently had that showed me how precious life is. I learned I almost got killed 12 years ago without realizing it back then!
A REAL VISION
As I awaken, I find myself huddled like a small ball in the bedroom’s corner. “Am I dead?” My heart pounds, and sweat trickles down my forehead. My mind is muddled with confusion, haunted by the vividness of my recent vision. Three radiant lights, forming a perfect triangle, drew nearer and nearer. The blaring of a horn penetrate my ears. The lights race toward me with astonishing high speed, leaving my mind struggling to comprehend. It dawns on me — a train hurtling toward me, leaving me no room to escape. Left and right, no options. Beneath, no sanctuary. I pass out as darkness claims me.
This real vision I had the first time a few weeks before a train actually almost killed me.
MY TIME ABROAD TURNED OUT DIFFERENTLY THAN I THOUGHT
As a 19-year-old girl, just graduated from Business School, I went abroad to the US to learn English fluently and work as an intern. I fell in love with an American handsome man, and our connection intensified within a few days.
Our love, though intense, proved to be fraught with challenges, destined for an uncertain future. I planned to attend a seven-month study program in Canada, and then return to Austria to continue with university. Despite our deep affection, we consciously avoided broaching the subject of our inevitable separation, tucking it away in the recesses of our hearts.
RECOUNTING WHAT HAPPENED
One evening, he surprised me with a dinner invitation to an exquisite restaurant. Our taste buds satisfied, he unveiled his plan to revisit an area that he loved to play at when he was young. As darkness draped the surroundings, we strolled past barn-style candy shops, guiding us toward railway tracks with a colossal steel bridge stretching across a wide river. Gazing at the river stirred an unsettling sensation within me, casting a shadow of fear. My boyfriend confidently started to balance on the railway tracks, asking me to follow. A wave of skepticism washed over me, prompting the question, “Are you certain no trains are approaching?” His reassuring response echoed, “Absolutely, those tracks have remained dormant for many years.” Doubts lingered as the tracks were not overgrown with grass. Nevertheless, I mustered the courage to step beyond my comfort zone, tracing his footsteps onto the bridge.
With a sickening feeling inside me, I continued to balance behind him. As we ventured further along the bridge, a sudden glimmer in the distance caught my attention — an ominous trio of brilliant lights arranged in a triangular formation. I am asking myself, “Are they coming closer?” The confirmation came swiftly, accompanied by a deafening, soul-piercing honk. Everything around me became chaotic, overwhelming my ability to think clearly. Panic consumed me. I screamed, “A train is coming!” His urgent response echoed through the chaos, “We must run towards it! We’re already halfway across the bridge!” Time ceased to exist for a moment; my body pulsated with a primal mix of adrenaline and anxiety. Following his lead, I sprinted behind him, fixated on the relentless approach of the three blinding lights. The noise intensified, amplifying the turmoil within me. Amidst the chaos, I weighed my options: to leap into the pitch-black depths of the river or to make myself so tiny that I could squeeze in between the train and the bridge railing; or I could try to lie down between the tracks and praying for the train to pass unscathed. As these thoughts raced through my mind, I kept racing forward, sprinting for my dear life. “I’ll be killed! There’s no chance of survival!” My legs propelled me with all my strength, and in just a brief two seconds, we hurled ourselves off the tracks. Tumbling down the grassy embankment, I came to rest, my heart pounding like never before. Struck with awe, I observed the colossal freight train racing across the bridge, looking like a never-ending serpent moving swiftly through the darkness.
DID I SURVIVE?
My gaze shifts upward to the sky. “Did I survive?” Above me, the full moon shines brightly. “I am alive!” Nearby, my boyfriend lies, giggling. Anger wells up within me, “This almost killed us!” He continues to chuckle, seemingly oblivious to the seriousness of the situation. Seeking comfort, I lie back on the grass, taking slow, deep breaths through my nose, trying to calm down my nervous system. After a few minutes, he breaks the silence, “We have to return to the car, and this bridge is our only way.” Panic sets in for a moment. Then, I notice a car bridge a few hundred meters away, spanning the same river. I insist that we take the safer route, pointing out the alternative. Persuading him, I propose both of us crossing the car bridge. I don’t have memories yet of how we made it back home.
MORE THAN A DECADE LATER
Years later, I came to the realization that I had experienced premonitions of a train-related tragedy before the actual incident. It was during an Akashic Records session I conducted for myself that everything fell into place. My Higher Self had been attempting to convey a message, urging me to exercise utmost caution with this man. Through the powerful combination of the timeless wisdom of Hermetic Alchemy and the Akashic Field, I delved into this memory, discovering profound insights. It dawned on me that the entire event had likely been orchestrated by my so-called boyfriend, and my world shattered. I surrendered to the suppressed emotions festering within me due to this trauma. It became evident that he must have been aware of the railway tracks still being in use. It was his pain that drove him to believe that removing both of us from the equation was the only solution. While going through our Akashic Creatorship Program, I embarked on a journey of healing the shattered trust, peeling back layer after layer to find forgiveness within myself. I have to admit that I am forever grateful for being able to apply the wisdom of the seven Alchemical steps, as they have pointed me to have this insight and heal.
I am forgiving. I am worthy of living, shining, and surrounding myself with people that genuinely love me. Life is just beginning.
